She grew weird, with each passing day. Distant herself from the people she loved. Maybe she was affraid of being vulnerable and loosing obviously. Ok so it never meant that the love vanished. They were in her heart every instance; with every step she took, every word she uttered and everytime she had a sip of tea. But yes she acted i-don’t-care-if-you-exist-or-not.
To her love was never a 24/7 thing. Meeting, chatting, and snapping: this wasn’t how she defined love. It’s not love for God’s sake! Love is just the value you give a person and only tell your heart about it. Not even ‘that’ person. You know it! Why would you express when your heart knows it? Why would you want that person to know?
Love is never expressing. It’s not even a give and take game. It should be there in your heart. It should be in missing them secretly, praying for them secretly, and lurking from behind the walls and watch them doing fine. And you’ll feel content. Cause why tell them when we know and that we consider it enough!
Sometimes the only therapy you need is being with someone. Not talking about ANYTHING heavy or light. You just need someone to be there. To be there by your side. And you feel content, as if half of the world’s burden that you were feeling on your shoulders the other day, is no more there; vanished *pooof*. Your mind and your heart is at peace. Because words aren’t therapeutic, silence is.
“Time’s running short. Things are changing and we’re aging. And I don’t know how to deal with this constant fear of growing up..
Replacing elders and moreover being involved in the practicalities of life. Everything seems like on a rail rush, if you won’t run faster, you’ll lose it! You have to run and run and run and run as fast as you can. Either, people will crush you under their feet..
Is this life? Growing up and being constantly fearful that things won’t be the same as they used to be. That this very moment won’t revise ever!
I’m affarid of this sudden but not so sudden change!”, she thought to herself as the clock ticked 3:00am and she poked herself, put a couple of morning alarms on her phone (because who wakes up on a single alarm bell :D), closed her eyes and wished for a peaceful sleep after a real hectic day.
It’s kind of like when you look at yourself in the mirror and you say your name. And it gets to a point where more of it seems real. Sometimes I can do that but I don’t need an hour in front of the mirror. It just happens very fast, and things start to slip away. And I just open my eyes, and I see nothing. And I start to breathe really hard trying to see something, but I can’t. It doesn’t happens all the time but when it does, it scares me.